Life changes by time

Hey! It's me coming back after more than a year I've been busy with my personal life. To summarize my life events in a sentence: things are changing, like literally.

I was planning many things ever since I entered Universitas Bakrie. To participate in HMPS,BEM,Senat Mahasiswa, is my sequential to-do plan. But as I said, things changed. HMPS taught me many, include those unfavorable things. I did have the joy, and did have the pain too. And thus I was reconsidering my plan, and instead I chose to not participate in BEM after HMPS ended. 

Not just my plan changed, my social circle has been changing too. People I used to spend time with, whom I thought would stay til the senior year here, have been not in my list of close people of mine anymore. I even am sure that I am not in their circle anymore. Sad, indeed. Like seriously, it's a fucking painful thing to begin with. But thats life, time passed, personality revealed and hatred has secretly been growing and spread. 

People I used to talk to for hours, I can't even say hello and naturally smile to them. 

It's very funny that people I think I am not gonna be close to, are now those I can rely on. 

Whats funnier is the activity I used to do hours, compromising class because I was too tired to wake up in he morning as a result of doing the stuffs till midnight, is now the activity I started to feel lazy about. 

I'm thinking that I personally change. Interest upon certain things and people are not the same as what I felt before. 

But that's not the point. What I wanted to tell you is, I think this is a process of shaping my maturity to a better one. Making decisions, to adapt in dynamic situations, to stay polite even to the ones you dislike, and to control emotion. I think I should be grateful and do some self-reflection. By the way, I am 20 now and surrounding by people I love (for now, and I hope they stay longer, or for..ever, forever is a long time btw).

I think it's also a fault to skip blogging. Now I started to think that blogging is a positive thing to do. Share positive things to other, is a good learning. In other side, it promotes good principal: to constantly share the goodness without even expecting something in return. 

I am planning to do a #WeeklyGoodness program, that I should share good things on weekly basis. I hope I can be consistent with this idea. See you on the next post :3

P.S. I'm in the middle of exams. I've done 7 subjects out of 8, and I'm gonna hav my exam on Tuesday. Wish me luck!

A daughter's prayer

"Dear God, I may not be your best believer. but for this time, I humbly beg you to give strength to my mom. she's been struggling to support our lives since you took dad some months ago. just don't give her more hardship because we are separated by distance and I just can't be there to hug and encourage her directly.

and more importantly, don't take her when I haven't paid all the sacrifice she's been giving for my whole life.."

Sophomore? soon on September!

hi! it's me coming back again. I've been going around doing many things meet many people laughing crying etc since the last time I shared about how I deeply felt stressed and cut my hair. now my hair has grown longer hahah but that's not the point of me writing again.

well this may be kinda strange, but I've just finished semester 2 here. I know other friends had already stated this since..2 weeks ago. not that I'm anti-mainstream or anything else, it's just, due to my trip to Malang and Purwokerto, I skipped 3 exams and I had to catch up on makeup exams and it's just finished by today.

I'm excited. no, I'm feeling much more complicated than just excited. I'm happy, teary, excited, kinda disappointed, a lil sad, etc. I've been spending 2 semesters here. and it seems like I don't really optimally enjoy my time here hahah. well, to be a freshman was really an unforgettable experience. believe it or not, at the very first time I lived a freshman life, I was feeling like..everything's difficult. I had to do everything by myself, moreover I was also far away from home and my family. I only knew few people. but by time, I discovered more. I knew more people. I interacted. and it became normal.

New haircut for a better luck

Yes. I'm cutting my hair. And yes, when most of people do feel stressful over something, they cut their hair. 

After 14th day..

"so yes, I'm now enjoying my chocolate. a sweet one. to boost up my mood. to cheer me up whenever I'm down and to sweeten those bitter things."

Thanks, April!

Hi!

It's nice to finally write here again. April until May 8th brought so many things. I took so many opportunities. Kaderisasi HMTI, Epicentrum Kebangsaan, ALSA E-Comp at UI, and midterm exam. sebenernya pengen ngepost satu-satu aja gitu, karena euforianya beda-beda. tapi apa daya, keterbatasan mood hahaha jadi gue jelasin satu-satu aja ya in general hihihi

Before going back to Jakarta.

Good morning people! It's so rare, that I'm writing in the morning. Because I often post in the evening or even midnight :p

So well, today is the day when February 2013 ends! That means I'm closer to the College life again. That also means my holiday will end soon.

Mantan Favorit: Mungkin Terbiasa

"setiap orang pasti punya mantan yang diam-diam masih lekat di hati orang tersebut even when they already find the new one"
Kita memang sering denger kata-kata kayak gitu. Entah itu di film, ftv, twitter, status facebook ataupun dari hati sendiri sebagai pembelaan ketika ada yang protes kalo teringat mantan. Biasanya sering disebut 'mantan terindah', 'mantan tak terlupakan', 'mantan kece badai cetar membahana terpampang nyata' atau apa saja. Gue sendiri punya kok. But I call mine, 'mantan favorit'.

Classmates.

I know they are enjoying their holiday now. But, I miss them..

Ternate

Hi. It's me again on my holiday.
So now, I'm no longer in Jakarta. I've been home since february 10th.
I ate many tasteful and delicious foods before I went here but I was not in a good mood to share those foods I ate and the experience I got hahah
Well, I secretly have planned the things I'm going to do in Ternate, such as:

PHP

Judul dan topik postingan kali ini kayaknya agak eye-catching deh guys. hmm sebenernya gue males banget ngepost kayak gini, ga ada interest buat bahas ini di blog gue yang yaaa.. dalam februari ini (direncanakan akan) banyak menceritakan tentang liburan gue lol

well.. gue akhir-akhir ini nemu temen baru. bukan temen baru juga sih.. dia temen kampus kok. dia follow twitter gue duluan trus gue followback trus kadang ngeretweet tweet gue, sampai suatu ketika.....pas uas pengantar teknik industri gue datengnya agak pagian dan di kampus ga ada makhluk sejenis gue alias maba kecuali Fajar (temen seprodi gue), Deni (pacar fajar) dan Adam (temen Deni). gue terus gabung dong sama mereka, yakali gue harus duduk sendiri di meja yang lain di student lounge kampus, kan bakal keliatan banget hampanya kayak apa -_-

First Thursday of my holiday

As what you've read on previous post, gue sekarang lagi liburan. gue punya 3 berita. agak bad news, good news, dan bad news dalam hari selasa di libur gue kali ini.

Berita yang agak bad adalah, gue sampai detik ini masih di Jakarta dan belum pulang ke ternate :(

tapi gue juga punya good news. I had so much fun today, eating foods, visiting places, meeting people, uh seru deeeh!

February

Hi Guys! It's February, isn't it?

Finally, I passed January..

Finally, I passed exam..

and finally, I passed semester 1 yeaay!

so yes, sekarang gue lagi menikmati bulan februari (everyone does it too, yen! -_-)

tapi februari yang gue nikmatin ini beda sama yang orang lain nikmatin. kenapa?

di saat kampus lain udah mulai kuliah lagi..

di saat anak-anak SMA sibuk try out sana sini buat persiapan UN ataupun SNMPTN..

di saat para ababil galau ga bisa moveon dari mantan..

dan di saat bunga sakura bermekaran di jepang...

gue.. gue.. gue.. liburan!

yeaaay liburan!

HI, 2013!

Hi. It's not my first post in 2013. But who cares? HAPPY NEW YEAR GUYS! I hope you had a very interesting and enjoyable new year eve.
Well, before it's too late to greet 2013 and to say bye bye to 2012. I decide to write this post.

Others could write and share their own kaleidoscope, others could write and share the story of their new year eve, others could write and share about their new year resolution. But me? Umm.. I still don't know what specific topic to talk about.

Dear, you..

"Dan sepertinya segala euforia serta rasa suka sesaat kepada orang yang berbeda-beda pun hilang dengan satu obrolan singkat saja denganmu. You miss me, don't you? Yeah, I miss you too... "

Happy birthday, friend!

The boy in this photo is one among my friends. His full name is Fikryadi A. Lukman. I often call him iky, because it's his nickname.
Well, dia adalah temen gue dari dulu.

Euphoria of being a freshman: butterflies in the stomach

In some of previous posts, I've implicitly and explicitly told you about my stories here in Universitas Bakrie. But I haven't shared about this kind of story. Guess what? Yep, it is the story of butterflies in my tummy.
Sebelum gue ceritain in details, gue mau bikin opening yang catchy dulu. Yaa biar ngena dan flowingnya biar dapet aja. (tapi kalo at the end, ga ngena dan ga ngeflow, yaudah, at least I try ._.)
Well... Pernah ga sih kalian ngerasain moment of butterfly in the stomach? Not literally ada kupu-kupu yang terbang di perut lo, atau ada kupu-kupu yang magically muncul di lambung lo. Tapi momen disaat..... Saat tanpa sengaja ataupun disengaja, ketemu 'seseorang'. Momen, dagdigdugserrr. Momen saat lo ngerasain kejang-kejang dalam hati. Momen yang bikin lo ngerasa ada rasa yang beda, jika dengan objek yang lain. Buat gue 'rasa' itu may not be 'love' --at the begining--. Mungkin, kesenangan yang ga biasa. Mungkin, kepuasan tersendiri. Dan mungkin, buat ngelatih hati.

Praktikum dan Mood Swing

After mid-term exam, ada praktikum kimia dasar. Ibu Dosennya ngasih pilihan waktu buat praktikum dan entah bagaimana, jadwal yang fix untuk gue dan teman2 TI-UB2012 yang lain adalah hari Selasa pukul 8 pagi. At that time, I thought "Great! Tuesday will be Hari Kimia. Paginya praktikum, siangnya teori" and I was so excited about doing praktikum. Not because I'm into chemistri, I am not really into chemistry actually. But because, ada lab baru gitudeh haha. It may sound ridiculous. It does loh. Tapi sampe sekarang I still don't know, why, at that time, I was so excited.

Implisit.

Tau implicit differentiation kan? Tau juga gimana rasanya punya perasaan ke orang tapi cuma bisa lewat diam? Nah, hidden feelings itu sama fungsi implisit. Cara solvingnya beda dan relatif lebih complicated.

"it's true that complaining can't simply solve your problem. But somehow, complaining can make you feel lighter. bisa bikin perasaan jadi lega. Kayak plong aja gitu. Jadi intinya, it's O.K to complain kok" -a friend.