Life changes by time

Hey! It's me coming back after more than a year I've been busy with my personal life. To summarize my life events in a sentence: things are changing, like literally.

I was planning many things ever since I entered Universitas Bakrie. To participate in HMPS,BEM,Senat Mahasiswa, is my sequential to-do plan. But as I said, things changed. HMPS taught me many, include those unfavorable things. I did have the joy, and did have the pain too. And thus I was reconsidering my plan, and instead I chose to not participate in BEM after HMPS ended. 

Not just my plan changed, my social circle has been changing too. People I used to spend time with, whom I thought would stay til the senior year here, have been not in my list of close people of mine anymore. I even am sure that I am not in their circle anymore. Sad, indeed. Like seriously, it's a fucking painful thing to begin with. But thats life, time passed, personality revealed and hatred has secretly been growing and spread. 

People I used to talk to for hours, I can't even say hello and naturally smile to them. 

It's very funny that people I think I am not gonna be close to, are now those I can rely on. 

Whats funnier is the activity I used to do hours, compromising class because I was too tired to wake up in he morning as a result of doing the stuffs till midnight, is now the activity I started to feel lazy about. 

I'm thinking that I personally change. Interest upon certain things and people are not the same as what I felt before. 

But that's not the point. What I wanted to tell you is, I think this is a process of shaping my maturity to a better one. Making decisions, to adapt in dynamic situations, to stay polite even to the ones you dislike, and to control emotion. I think I should be grateful and do some self-reflection. By the way, I am 20 now and surrounding by people I love (for now, and I hope they stay longer, or for..ever, forever is a long time btw).

I think it's also a fault to skip blogging. Now I started to think that blogging is a positive thing to do. Share positive things to other, is a good learning. In other side, it promotes good principal: to constantly share the goodness without even expecting something in return. 

I am planning to do a #WeeklyGoodness program, that I should share good things on weekly basis. I hope I can be consistent with this idea. See you on the next post :3

P.S. I'm in the middle of exams. I've done 7 subjects out of 8, and I'm gonna hav my exam on Tuesday. Wish me luck!

A daughter's prayer

"Dear God, I may not be your best believer. but for this time, I humbly beg you to give strength to my mom. she's been struggling to support our lives since you took dad some months ago. just don't give her more hardship because we are separated by distance and I just can't be there to hug and encourage her directly.

and more importantly, don't take her when I haven't paid all the sacrifice she's been giving for my whole life.."

Sophomore? soon on September!

hi! it's me coming back again. I've been going around doing many things meet many people laughing crying etc since the last time I shared about how I deeply felt stressed and cut my hair. now my hair has grown longer hahah but that's not the point of me writing again.

well this may be kinda strange, but I've just finished semester 2 here. I know other friends had already stated this since..2 weeks ago. not that I'm anti-mainstream or anything else, it's just, due to my trip to Malang and Purwokerto, I skipped 3 exams and I had to catch up on makeup exams and it's just finished by today.

I'm excited. no, I'm feeling much more complicated than just excited. I'm happy, teary, excited, kinda disappointed, a lil sad, etc. I've been spending 2 semesters here. and it seems like I don't really optimally enjoy my time here hahah. well, to be a freshman was really an unforgettable experience. believe it or not, at the very first time I lived a freshman life, I was feeling like..everything's difficult. I had to do everything by myself, moreover I was also far away from home and my family. I only knew few people. but by time, I discovered more. I knew more people. I interacted. and it became normal.

New haircut for a better luck

Yes. I'm cutting my hair. And yes, when most of people do feel stressful over something, they cut their hair. 

After 14th day..

"so yes, I'm now enjoying my chocolate. a sweet one. to boost up my mood. to cheer me up whenever I'm down and to sweeten those bitter things."